Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
