So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
