I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
