Soap is not a condiment
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
