this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize