I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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