You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
