is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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