everyone is single if you try hard enough
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
