I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
