Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
