I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize