fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I want to have your abortion
when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
