Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
