Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
