Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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