i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
vagina is talking i cant
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
