As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Randomize
