i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
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