Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
