THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize