Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
