is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
