her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Randomize
