But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
