Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize