Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Randomize
