You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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