and you said cock pushups were impossible
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
