I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
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