can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
