i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
