I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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