He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
