I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
