I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Randomize
