i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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