i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
