uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
A+ Viking dick
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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