After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Randomize