Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Randomize
