and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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