The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
