Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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