I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize