OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
