You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Randomize
