Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
