All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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