i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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