We got so high we made milksteak
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
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